Superman wears Jack Bauer pajamas.

Jack Bauer is my hero. And that is likely what this entire blog will be about.

It's not so much that he could literally take over the world if the only remaining part of his body was his pinky finger that makes me give JB my well-deserved respect. It's more the sheer amount of shit this guy can get away with and leave every 24-addict leaping with joy and cheering him on the whole way.

Take tonight's episode of 24, in which Jack reunited with his brother (with whom he hasn't spoken in 4 seasons ... ahem ... days ... okay - years and years). Within 5 minutes of seeing him again, Jack, in his brother's own home, had punched his lights out, locked the two of them in his oversized office, tied him to a chair by the wires of a lamp and pulled a plastic bag over his head saying "you did this to yourself."
And let's not forget that within the first hour of returning to the U.S. (after a 20-month stint in a Chinese torture prison) Jack Bauer escaped one of the most powerful terrorists in the world by killing a man with his teeth. That's right, Kiefer went back to his old days as a blood-sucking vampire in "Lost Boys." After not having spoken a word in almost 2 years, and after having been tortured during that minor period of his life, he had the strength and guts to crunch down on a trained guard's jugular and rip it out, thereby killing him, with his MOUTH.
Oh, he also shot and killed his most trusted and best-skilled, best friend. And what do we do? We gasp a little, we say "wtf just happened?! Did Jack just kill Curtis?! But I LOVE Curtis!" Then a nuke goes off and we say "Go, Jack, GO! You did what you had to ... poor Jack, what an emotionally rough return to work. "

Let's look at this mathematically:
A = Man kills best friend = evil
B = Man tortures long-lost brother = rude
C = Man kills man with teeth = PSYCHOPATHIC

Therefore, ...
A + B + C = unlikely probability of man having a cheerleading squad equaling the population of the United States of America.

Now I'm no pro at proofs. I haven't had to do one since 7th grade, in fact. But I think you get the point.

So what am I getting at with all this banter? Nothing that I was actually planning to get to, really. But after compiling the evidence, I've surprised myself (and you?) by actually coming to a point here. Jack Bauer is a man with the candor of God, the physical tenacity of Atlas, and the imperialism of Zeus. His name has become synonymous with Chuck Norris', only we're serious when we say "Jack Bauer wasn't born -- he was unleashed."

He's nothing short of a modern-day superhero, and he's been deemed all these things by taking on terrorists with brute force and plenty of violence. Jack Bauer and his 24 crew have together earned millions of dollars and just as many fans; in 2006 the show raked in 12 Emmy nominations and took home 4, two of them from the biggest categories: "Outstanding Lead Actor in a Drama Series" and "Outstanding Drama Series." This year promises another slew of awards.
Needless to say, we're big proponents of this character's career, and it's fun to be part of a cultish following similar to that of college football or LOST fans. I just think it's interesting that this type of fervor lives strong in the hearts of so many, and yet we scratch our heads in utter confusion as to how George W. Bush ever got re-elected. Hmmm ...

I'm not trying to get anyone to watch - or not watch - this undeniably entertaining drama. But it raises the question of just how much fictionalized politics affect the real thing. Do we, in some immeasurable way, keep from keeping peace because we can't betray the undefeatable ideal that Jack Bauer represents?

Chew on that, why don't you? :)